Wednesday, September 10

High School Fashion Tips

1. Tight, knee-length jean shorts make everyone look "broad in the beam." Everyone. Even the super-skinny girls.

2. A tailored shirt, with darts to shape to a bosom, look very silly if one is lacking said bosom.

3. Hello Kitty fashion: only if you are under 9, or Asian.

4. You really should wash your hair more than twice a week.

5. Skinny white boy--your matching diamond stud earrings make you look silly and ridiculous.

6. Girls in tight short skirts--I can see your underwear when you sit down. I find it silly and annoying. My male colleagues counterparts find it far more distracting and disturbing.

7. Yes, ladies--the cute boy will notice your plunging neckline, as will EVERYONE else, including the other girls, the teachers, the janitor, and especially the nerdy boy who has a crush on you. Y'know how you always complain that he just WON'T leave you alone and you don't know why--your shirt is why.

3 comments:

Paul and Alicia said...

High school fashion is always disturbing...particularly right now. It's like a somewhat sluttier version of an 80's party gone bad...don't know how you do it day after day!

Kelley said...

gag

Kelley said...

gag