Sweet, dumb kids.

I've spent 5-6 hours in the last two days dealing with children behaving badly. Being the one who discovered the bad behavior, I've been in meetings with various deans and administrators trying to levy just and appropriate responses to various misbehaviors. I'm satisfied that the punishments are fitting the "crimes," and that our decisions will deliver both grace and justice. But I'm sad. I wish I could save them from themselves, especially the ones who do dumb things because they are immature, or confused, or hurting. But, maybe this is the exact situation that will teach them what they need to learn. Maybe this punishment will be the vaccine to save this kid from further pain.

Sometimes I think of myself as a childless mother. I have a strong maternal instinct and I love my students, even when (especially when?) I must discipline them. If I wasn't a teacher, and I didn't have a couple hundred teenagers to pour love into everyday, I think I'd go crazy. I am so thankful for them, and for the opportunity they give me to love. But today, after 5 hours of teaching, 3 hours of intense meetings, 45 minutes of "hanging out" and another 20 minutes of intense counseling, I'm wiped. And I'm really, really sad that some of my kids are hurting--even if it's their own dumb fault.